Abstract:
Workplace drama can turn even the best medical practice into a tense and miserable place to work. Many of us have experienced firsthand the discomfort that comes from working where rumor mills, office cliques, tattling, gossiping, backstabbing, shouting, crying, shunning, blatant histrionics, and other workplace drama are common. This article defines workplace drama and describes its three components. It suggests 10 strategies medical practice managers can use to discourage workplace drama, or keep it to a minimum, and explores the most common reasons that some employees enjoy stirring up drama. It describes the six signs of drama addiction and the high cost of workplace drama. In addition, this article provides a list of questions drama instigators can ask to stop themselves from stirring up more drama in your medical practice. It offers five tips for employees who wish to avoid coworker drama and describes the high cost of workplace drama.
Most employees don’t want to be associated with having or causing workplace drama. In fact, those who do stir up and spread drama may not realize that they are doing so. According to Chism,(1) there is good reason for this disconnect. The concept of “drama,” when used in the context of human relationships, can be scary and negative. Says Chism, “On the personal front, it conjures up images of screaming matches between spouses, or a two-year-old’s temper tantrums. On the professional front, drama elicits visions of the workplace bully, a mean boss, power struggles over seniority, backstabbing, overacting to change, and office gossip.”
In reality, workplace drama reveals itself in all kinds of ways, most of which are so subtle that they are hard to identify until the damage is done. In fact, drama’s effects usually are the result of a failure to recognize it when it first started. “You ignore a subtle innuendo from a coworker; two years later, you have a workplace bully situation,” Chism(1) warns. Workplace drama is such a huge and insidious problem precisely because it begins under the radar, and ramps up undetected until it causes a problem.
Fortunately, the medical practice manager can actively discourage and reduce workplace drama. There are many strategies that can help. Keep in mind, however, that as long as you employ human beings in your medical practice, you will not be able to eliminate drama entirely. Therefore, a more reasonable goal is to manage it.
What Is Workplace Drama?
Simply put, workplace drama is any human obstacle to your medical practice’s peace and prosperity. The obstacle can be the voice in your head, the employee causing you grief, or the economic situation that has everyone in a state of panic about job security.
Workplace drama can drag a practice down or, at the very least, can make living and working in it very unpleasant.
According to Chism,(1) medical practices need to have peace in order to have and to enjoy their prosperity. “Having prosperity without peace usually brings a hollow victory,” Chism warns. Workplace drama can drag a practice down or, at the very least, can make living and working in it very unpleasant.
Workplace drama has three components, Chism(2) says: lack of clarity; a relationship issue; and resistance. Therefore, if you suspect that workplace drama is at play in your medical practice, ask:
Where is there a lack of clarity?
What is the relationship issue?
Where is the resistance, and who is resisting what?
Even if you can answer only one of these questions, you will begin to unravel the drama, Chism(2) suggests. Only by identifying the drama can you begin to change it, she says.
Ten Ways to Discourage, Reduce, and Manage Workplace Drama
Once you have identified workplace drama in your medical practice, the place to begin managing it is within yourself, in your own management practices. Following are 10 strategies for the medical practice manager that will discourage workplace drama, or at least keep it to a minimum.
Become fully present for your employees. Workplace drama has the best opportunity to blossom and grow when employees feel that you are not listening to or paying attention to them. As much as you may be tempted to multitask when an employee is talking to you, put everything aside for the moment and give the employee your full attention. Make eye contact and squarely face your body toward the employee. Ask clarifying questions. Communicate that you are listening by nodding your head, smiling (where appropriate), and leaning slightly toward the employee. And if the employee catches you at a bad time, let him or her know that you have other pressing priorities but that you want to hear what he or she has to say. Schedule an appointment for a time when you can be fully present, and honor that commitment. Let your employees know that you are do care about what they are doing and that you have your eyes and ears open.
Model a no-drama approach. A medical practice manager is in an excellent position to create and fuel drama by his or her example, or to show employees a better way to handle themselves. Be sure that you are not overreacting when the chips are down. For example, check your own response when an employee makes a mistake or when you’re under a lot of pressure. Simply and calmly acknowledge the problem and ask for what you want and need. Don’t raise your voice. And when you must correct behavior, do so when you are in control of your emotions, preferably in private. What not to do: Lecture employees. Overreact. Panic. Make more of the situation than it really is. And, go on a tirade. Your employees will pay much more attention to what you do than to what you say to them. Model drama for your employees and you’ll be much more likely to see drama in your medical practice.
Become more transparent. Employees who suspect that you are concealing information from them may invent things that aren’t there. According to Chism,(3) “Drama increases in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty.” The more open and proactive you are with your staff, the less they will have to fear, and the less need they will have to guess what’s going on and spin that into drama.
Establish and implement personnel policies. A medical practice that does not establish clear personnel policies and teach them to its employees can be a hotbed for unnecessary drama. Just like the old saying “Good fences make good neighbors,” good policies contribute to good workplace relationships and less drama. Make sure your employees know your policies about tardiness, absenteeism, time off for vacations and illness, handling workplace conflicts, and similar personnel issues.
Be clear about how you want your employees to communicate. Do your employees know that there are undramatic ways to interact with one another? As John Hawkins, CEO of MPI Consulting,suggests, “Can you tell from reading your job descriptions and performance evaluation forms that workplace drama is not the preferred way to deal with individual thoughts, needs, and questions?” (personal communication). Make your preferred team communication behaviors a regular part of your employee training.
Tweak your open door policy. On the one hand, you want your employees to come to you with their concerns and problems. On the other, your job as a medical practice manager is not to listen every time an employee wants to gripe, vent, and tattle. Of course, there are times when you will want to give an employee an opportunity to get something off of his or her chest. And, there are certainly times when one employee should blow the whistle on another, particularly when safety or the quality of patient care is at stake. However, frequent, unproductive griping, venting, and tattling are wastes of both your time and the employee’s time. And in some instances, venting can make things worse. Focusing on negative feelings can sometimes fuel more workplace drama. Open your door to employees who want to share helpful and productive information and ideas. But close it to those who come to you with unproductive griping, venting, and tattling.
Look for teachable moments. You may encounter times when members of your team get so caught up in workplace drama that the drama spins out of control. When everything finally calms down, you may be able to bring your staff together to talk about what happened, and to explore with your employees how they might have handled things more productively. Teachable moments such as these are generally easiest to facilitate when the drama has subsided, not in the moment. However, if the drama in your medical practice becomes too powerful and disruptive, you may have no choice but to call a time out with your staff, tell them what you see going on, and lead them toward more productive behaviors. You will have the best results teaching your staff to let go of the drama when your employees trust you and one another, and when no member of the team feels that everyone has ganged up on him or her. Therefore, keep your teachable moments as positive and encouraging as possible. Afterward, positively reinforce behavioral improvements that you observe, even small ones.
Be consistent and fair. Nothing contributes to workplace drama more than the feeling that the boss is unpredictable and unfair. As Chism(3) says, “Letting your star performer break the rules or ignore policy contributes to negativity and a lack of trust. The only way to be fair is to make sure everyone operates from the same rule book and that everyone understands the expectations and consequences of not abiding by the rules.” If you think you can let an employee slide by or that you can look the other way and let him or her get away with something, chances are you’re wrong. Stick to your rules. As Chism(3) suggests, “Let policy be the bad guy.”
Reinforce the behavior you want. Medical practice managers may inadvertently reinforce workplace drama when they pay more attention to the drama and to those who cause it than to employees who are focused and engaged in their work. Reduce the duration and impact of the drama in your office by shifting employees away from their drama-producing reactions toward more productive ones. Hawkins recommends that managers use “bridge statements” to get employees away from their drama. Ask questions like, “Do you have a suggestion for how to solve this issue?” or “I can tell that you are frustrated and can see this is getting in the way of your ability to move forward. What can you do or what can I do to help you clarify the situation and where we can have the most impact?” Or say, “I am worried that you are seeing this as a much bigger problem than I do. Let’s talk through what we know for sure and determine the best path forward.” Bridge statements such as these push employees toward finding solutions and let them know that creating drama is not your preferred response to the problem at hand.
Link workplace drama to employee performance. Workplace drama is a legitimate performance issue because it is unproductive and can interfere with teamwork and productivity in your medical practice. Therefore, if you have a habitual drama maker on your team, discuss this during your regular performance review with that employee. Cite specific instances when the employee’s drama was not only not helpful, but also, potentially harmful. Establish clear expectations and goals about what the employee needs to do differently. Give the employee a chance to change and improve. But be prepared to take firmer action if the drama continues or if it worsens. Begin documenting specific drama instances and issue warnings. Be clear with the employee that drama-making can ultimately be cause for dismissal. Then follow through. You can’t afford to have anyone on your team whose drama consistently undermines morale, derails others from their work, and/or spills over to your patients.
Why Some People Love Drama
Workplace drama is so unpleasant for most of us that it can be baffling to figure out why anyone would want to stir it up. However, there are quite a few benefits that can be gained through workplace drama. According to therapist Cherilynn Veland,(4) some people love drama because of the adrenaline, cortisol, rage, and energy that it brings them. Veland calls these benefits the “secondary gain.” As Veland explains, “Secondary gains are the upsides that people get from a behavior, even an unwanted behavior. For example, the upside to feeling victimized might be a self-imposed excuse to overeat or abuse alcohol.” There are many other secondary gains we get from any situation, Veland says. For example, workplace drama can provide people with:
A powerful distraction from their own lives and problems: If an employee has something or someone to be mad at or upset about, workplace drama can make it easier to disengage from those issues, Veland says. It can channel energy away from the difficult and unpleasant issues that a person needs to be focusing on, but doesn’t want to.
Familiarity and comfort: Some employees grew up in dysfunctional homes or within families where addiction or trauma was ever present. They may have learned to stir up drama to cope with the dysfunction. We are drawn to what we know. It is not unusual for people from dysfunctional families to find themselves in emotionally loaded scenarios again and again. “They are drawn back into this old stuff,” Veland explains. They resort to drama because they may not know how to disengage and detach healthfully.
An addictive chemical reaction: Veland explains that dopamine is released when we are angry. Dopamine can be addictive, Veland says, causing people to engage and reengage in anger cycles. According to Veland, the dopamine, “feeds the feel good parts of our brains.” For more information about drama addiction, see “The Six Signs of Drama Addiction” below.
An exaggerated sense of self-importance: A person who is in the center of workplace drama may feel that he or she matters. This is true even if the person is the object of anger, misfortune, or derision, Veland says, likening this feeling to what she calls the “car accident phenomenon.” Explains Veland, “People are prone to slow down if there is a car accident because we don’t to miss out on what is happening.” Some people enjoy the attention they receive when they are embroiled in drama, even negative drama, Veland suggests.
Unfortunately, drama has its downside too, Veland says. With it come new traumas. Old injuries get reawakened. And drama can keep people from having more peaceful and enriched lives, Veland warns.
The Six Signs of Drama Addiction
Drama addiction, like all addictions, provides some form of pleasure. That’s what makes it so seductive. According to Ferry,(5) although you can’t always avoid or escape drama, “you can choose not to let it consume you.” The place to begin recovery is for a drama addict to recognize and own his or her addiction. Ferry suggests that there are the six telltale signs. The drama addict:
Loves to gossip;
Is always in the middle of a crisis;
Is glued to high-drama news, magazine, and television stories;
Has a tendency to overreact and behave irrationally;
Makes everything a bigger deal than it actually is; and
Is a pot stirrer.
A good next step: Ferry suggests that drama addicts disengage from people who bring constant drama into their lives. Says Ferry, “It’s much easier to stay out of drama when you surround yourself with people who don’t live in drama.” Better: Surround yourself with people who recognize life’s bumps as just that—a momentary hiccup, Ferry suggests.
How to Stop Being a Drama King or Queen
Do you find that you frequently bring or amplify the drama in your medical practice? If so, you can choose to react to what’s going on around you in better, healthier ways. According to Giles,(6) the key to stopping the drama king or queen behavior is to ask yourself the following questions before you get upset, offended, or bothered by something:
How big a deal will this be 10 years from now? Step back from this situation and try to get a long-term perspective on it. Chances are in the long haul this isn’t that big of a deal, Giles says.
Am I taking this more personally than I have to? Could your immediate reaction be rooted in fear? Fear drives most human behavior, Giles says. She suggests that you consider what other people may be afraid of, too. “If you can identify their fear, you will understand that it isn’t really about you,” Giles says.
What does this other person really want and need? What is the underlying cause of his or her behavior? Giles suggests that you may be able to handle challenges best when you can give people what they need most.
Is my fear of failure (not being good enough) in the way? Low self-esteem can make you see insults and injuries in everything, Giles says. It can make you blow problems out of proportion. And it can make you feel offended by things that really can’t hurt you.
Do I remember that I get to choose how I will experience each situation? You have the power to choose your emotions. You can choose to be hurt and offended if you want to. You can create all kinds of unnecessary drama around any offense. You can use drama to cast the other person as the bad guy so you can feel superior. You can also use it to play the victim and get sympathy and love. However, if you choose to stir up drama, your coworkers will lose respect for you and you will be giving away your power, Giles warns. Instead, remember that no person and no situation can make you upset. You are the one responsible for those thoughts, so only you can make you upset. As Giles suggests, “Take responsibility for how you choose to feel.”
Am I seeing this person or people as the same as me? We have a subconscious tendency to see other people as better as or worse than ourselves. This mindset creates a lot of unnecessary drama, self-pity, and conflict, Giles warns. In reality, we are all the same. We have the same value. We are struggling, scared, divine, amazing human beings in process, Giles says. She adds, “We are all students in the classroom of life and we are all afraid we aren’t good enough. When you see people as the same as you, you will respond with more love, compassion and wisdom.”
Does this person’s bad behavior need to be addressed? There are times when it most definitely does. However, you must set aside your need to be right, superior, or angry, Giles suggests. If you can do that, you may be able to let some things go and to put a lid on the drama.
References
Chism M. Stop Workplace Drama: Train Your Staff to Have No Complaints, No Excuses, and No Regrets. Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons; 2011.
Chism M. Workplace drama: how to define it and identify it. Power Magazine. January 1, 2012. www.powermag.com/workplace-drama-how-to-define-it-and-identify-it/?pagenum=2 . Accessed March 29, 2017.
Chism M. Four ways to reduce workplace negativity by increasing consistency. Tanveer Naseer Blog. February 27, 2011. www.tanveernaseer.com/how-to-stop-workplace-drama/ . Accessed March 28, 2017.
Veland C. Some people love conflict and drama. Psych Central. https://blogs.psychcentral.com/psychology-women/2014/08/some-people-love-conflict-and-drama/ . Accessed March 29, 2017.
Ferry T. Are you addicted to drama? The Huffington Post. June 24, 2010. www.huffingtonpost.com/tom-ferry/self-help-are-you-addicte_b_623182.html . Accessed March 24, 2017.
Giles K. How to stop being a drama queen. JournalStar. September 9, 2015. www.pjstar.com/article/ZZ/20150909/NEWS/309099870 . Accessed March 30, 2017.
Five Tips to Avoid Coworker Drama
It can be challenging to stay out of coworker drama, even when you don’t want to be involved in it. Should you avoid an office drama instigator altogether? Try to defend yourself? Do your best to ignore the flying gossip? Or, should you stand up for yourself and intervene? Williams(1) offers five tips for employees:
Prevention is better than repair. Try to remain friendly and pleasant with everyone in the medical practice, even coworkers you find challenging to be around. Say hello and offer a sincere smile. These simple gestures can go a long way toward keeping your coworkers on your good side.
Go to the source. If you hear that a coworker is trashing you to other coworkers or to your boss, don’t stew about it or retaliate. Instead, go to your coworker and ask directly what’s going on. It may not be an easy conversation. However, you may discover hurt feelings you were unaware of having caused or some other issue that surprises you. And, you may uncover misconceptions and misunderstandings that you can now straighten out.
Look forward, not back. Fight the urge to analyze who said what and who was right or wrong in a dispute. In many cases, this kind of focus just escalates the problem. Instead, tell your coworker that you’d like to put the problem behind you and figure out how you can get along better from now on. Let go of wanting to prove that you were right. That will only deepen the trenches between you.
Put things right with your boss. For example, if your coworker told your boss that you don’t pull your weight and you know you that you do, explain that you feel that there is a misconception at play. Answer any questions your boss asks. Remain calm. Offer evidence to support your point of view. But don’t attack your coworker.
Don’t fuel the drama. If a coworker is spreading rumors about you, chances are that he or she is spreading rumors about other people too. Others will eventually see that this person is a gossip and will take these rumors with a grain of salt. Keep doing great work. You and your coworker will both develop the reputations you deserve.
Reference
Williams E. Five ways to avoid coworker drama. Workplacerantings.com. February 27, 2017. www.workplacerantings.com/5-ways-to-avoid-coworker-drama/. Accessed March 29, 2017.
The High Cost of Workplace Drama
Workplace drama is a rampant problem in the United States that can have a severe impact on an organization’s bottom line. Insight Management Consulting(1) paints a disturbing picture. They say, “Since the Great Recession, an unhealthy mixture of anxiety, fear, and stress has caused extraordinary upheaval in many organizations. Burned out, overworked, and underappreciated employees who were fortunate enough to keep their jobs are now acting out. Under pressure to meet unrealistic expectations, they are blaming, backstabbing, and bemoaning. The deluge of workplace drama is hampering productivity and personal effectiveness.”
Insight Management Consulting warns that U.S. employees spend an average of 2.8 hours per week dealing with workplace drama, or the equivalent of 385 million working days annually. “That’s a lot of unproductive time and money spent complaining, gossiping, and retaliating; time not spent doing the job employees were hired to do,” they warn. In addition to wasted time and money, unchecked workplace drama leads to poor morale, high absenteeism, and attrition. Adds Insight Management Consulting, “Increased stress-related medical conditions, safety issues, and grievances” also are costly side effects of workplace drama.
Reference
Insight Management Consulting. The high cost of workplace drama. Insight Management Consulting. November 2, 2015. www.findinsight.com/the-high-cost-of-workplace-drama/. Accessed March 27, 2016.
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